Sunday, May 24, 2009

Have I Mentioned that Healthcare Sucks?

You know it stinks when you get older (as I seem to be doing against my own will), you just go to the doctor more. Now, if you have a fantastic doctor, that's not a biggie. Let me explain why I hate going to the doctor:

First and foremost, my doctor's waiting room is huge and makes me feel like I am in the middle of a very overpopulated country. (Most seats are taken)

There are a "team" of receptionists to check in patients, collect co-pays and direct traffic.

The doctors are ALWAYS late. So, hopefully you haven't scheduled anything after your appointment or you will be late (or miss it altogether).

Once your name is called, you feel like a steer that is being corralled into a pen by a very cranky nurse with a clipboard.

Terrorists could attack at this moment or Armeggedon could be in process, it doesn't matter. You have to get weighed. (which they loudly announce the results to themselves as they scribble on their clipboard).

A nurse will usher you into an examination room and throw a gown with a million ties, snaps and other shit that you can't figure out and just wrap it around you the best you can.

The nurse sits at the computer and types in your complaints, asks what meds you are on and tells you that the doctor will be in to see you in a second.

You wait

You wait

You wait

Finally, doctor comes in, asks you the same things the nurse did and keys them into the computer. They poke, prod, respond to "uh-huh" to your comments and conversation and begin scribbling prescriptions. They say they will be right back....and

You wait

You wait

You wait

You get dressed and ask the nurse running from room to room, "The doctor said she was coming back...where is she?"

"She is seeing another patient. What do you want?" she asks impatiently.

"Uh, to ask some questions..." the nurse looks extremely aggitated and responds, "You will have to wait 4 hours to speak with her personally, that is her last appointment for the day."

I look at her and think to myself, Yeah, right...I'm going to wait 4 more hours to ask a question that she should have addressed during my appointment. NOT

I decide to forego the marathon doctor's appointment and offer my usual catch phrase after a doctor's appointment, screw it.

I make my way to the entrance of the hospital and look for the valet (i told you it was like being in an overpopulated country) to give my receipt to get my car. They left for the day and I have to walk to the other side of the hospital (world) to get my keys and fetch my car myself.

I get home and time I'll wait until I feel good before I go to the doctor.

More Musings Later-

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