Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Stepping Away for a Time...

By the brevity of my previous last few posts, I think you've figured it out that I have and am stepping away from writing for a bit.  Not permanently, I could never do that.  But, for now, a much needed rest from wordsmithing.

Why?  Well, it's complicated.  I don't feel that I can speak my thoughts and opinions freely until my personal situation has come to a complete resolution.  If you've read prior posts, you can probably connect the dots on my situation.

In any event, I'll post from time to time and will hope to write on schedule soon.  Until then, I thank you for reading my blog and leaving words of praise and encouragement.  It means more than you think.

More Musings Much Later....

Monday, July 01, 2013

The "N" word and Paula Deen

My, there is an uproar regarding Paula Deen's mention of the highly offensive word, "N*****".

To tell you the truth, I am a little surprised that she actually told the truth in her deposition.  It seems that alot of people fudge or even completely bold-face lie during those things, but I digress. (Bill Clinton and some other folks come to mind).

When you stop and think about it, Paula Deen is of that generation that lived through the civil rights movement AND she lives in the deep south.  I'm not saying she should get a free pass to say that word or any other demeaning phrase.  I AM saying the woman needs to explain herself completely.

Deen is clinging to the role of victim with the desperate hope that her fans will ignore her prior transgressions.  In fact, Deen is playing the role of victim so well that when she was on the Today show, she acknowledges saying the word but then makes reference to the Bible verse stating "those without sin, cast the first stone..."  It all craters from there.  She ends the reference with blubbering and wearing the crown of martyr.  "Throw that stone so hard at my head that it kills me!" she wails to the camera.  "I want to meet you!" she cries, again referring to wanting to meet someone without sin.

This is just my 2 cents, but you know what she should have done? Don't skip out on the Today show due to "exhaustion".  Go on the show as scheduled and explain yourself.  Something like this:  "I grew up and lived during the civil rights era.  There was alot of ignorance in the day toward citizens who happened to be black. It was an ugly period in U.S. History and particularly so in the south.  I did say the "N Word" but I have grown and evolved since the days when I uttered that hateful word.  I'm not proud of using that term and haven't said that word again in (insert # of years here.)"

That's it.  There really is no reason to blubber on television, plead with America to "throw the first stone," etc.  Just explain yourself.  If the above truly reflects your opinion of the civil rights era, no reasonable person would fault you for what you said years ago.  Everybody deserves a second chance and I'm quite willing to give Paula Deen hers.  But don't ask me to throw a stone at your head so you can play martyr, cause I just might have to do as you request.

More Musings Later-

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

I Remember "First Days"

This morning I went to the grocery store to pick up a few items that I needed.  Outside, it looked like rain so I naturally wanted to get in and out of the store as quickly as possible so that I wasn't stuck loading groceries in and out of my car during a rain storm.

Once I grabbed the last item, I waited in line to be checked out.  The number of lines open were sparse because there weren't many shoppers out since it was a "work" day. So, I picked a line and waited...and waited...and waited.  There was a woman in front of me who was the visual definition of aggravation.  Her Kroger card wasn't working and she wasn't about to pay "full price" for some fruit she wanted to purchase.  As you can imagine, the hierarchy of store personnel was dispatched one by one to assist a very frazzled checker.  

People behind me were groaning and giving dirty looks to the checker as they waited impatiently in line.  It was quite a lesson that was being given in my neighborhood store but no one was getting it.  I watched as the  supervisor then assistant manager, then the store manager frantically questioned the checker while punching and jabbing the buttons on her register.  Everyone was huffing and puffing, giving dirty looks, slapping a contrary cash register and I was watching the frazzled checker put the brakes on tears that wanted desperately to spill on her cheeks.

I asked her the obvious.  "This your first day?"  She looked at me mournfully and nodded yes.  I looked around again and the woman in front of me was still getting snippy with the hierarchy of store personnel and the sacker began shouting over the din, "Do you want me to open another register or what?"  All because people were being impatient.  Waiting for the line to flow again and for the poor checker who was having a glaringly bad first day.

She turned to me once more; "I'm so sorry..."  I waved her off and said, "Look, I remember first days.  They suck.  Once you've been doing this job for a several days, you'll look back and say, 'Why did I struggle with this so much?"  She listened and cocked her head as she thought about what I said.  "You're going to have ALOT of first days.  They all suck, the secret is to trust yourself and just get past that one day.  I have no where to be, so take your time."  She smiled gratefully and finally got to my checking of groceries.

Guess what? She didn't make any mistakes.  She had a smile on her face and I got a heartfelt, "Thank You." In this age of technology, we are becoming less and less patient, both with ourselves and others.   Next time you're standing in line and grumbling about it, remember, it might be someone's first day.

More Musings Later-

Thursday, March 07, 2013

Giving Advice from Sage to Innocense

I've been in a very pensive mood these days.  I guess getting into later years does that to a person.  An old friend of 30 some odd years spent the holidays with me and my sister this past year and telling old stories of "remember when?" were constantly recounted.  They were some awfully good times back in the day.  Yet, there were some pretty awful times too.  I looked at my guest and saw the years of life experience all over his face and knew I had the same.  In fact, we traveled a fairly similar path.  I guess that is what got me to thinking about decisions and experiences that I've had over the years.

I guess when we are younger, we feel like we have the world by the tail.  I call that innocence. We all know that the further we travel into our life, the more humble and somewhat overwhelmed at times we become with the life process.  I was always a worrier, even as a child.  Afraid to make mistakes, look stupid, you name it.  If I had only known then what I know now.  We all make mistakes, look stupid and the key is to get back up and continue on with the business of life.  There IS a point to it, I feel certain.  And, I can see key lessons that I've had to repeat over and over because I failed to pass the "earth pop test".

If I had the chance, I would have loved to sit my innocent self down from many years ago and offer some advice from my sage life experience.  Like what, you ask?

1. You might as well get over the fear of looking stupid and making mistakes.  Everybody makes'em and everybody looks stupid on a fairly regular basis.

2. This is a big one:  Trust your gut.  Get a bad feeling about a person?  job? Trust yourself.  Walk away from anything that sounds your inner alarm.  It's okay to do that.

3. Did you walk away from the experience that set your inner alarm off and it turned out to be okay in spite of it?  That's okay.  You're human.

4. Are you in a job where you are increasingly frustrated, stressed and feeling trapped?  Run, do not walk away from this job.  It wouldn't hurt to look for opportunities while still employed, but if nothing presents itself, work for a temp agency.  No job or situation is worth aggravation, despair, frustration or feeling stressed.  YOU are more important than that.

5. I'll warn you innocent self, you're going to fall in love one day and fall in love HARD.  Don't fret about it so much.  Enjoy this intoxicating feeling.  It's rare to be truly in love, so enjoy it.  Enjoy and remember every wonderful second you can.

6. Remembering those wonderful moments will take some of the sting out of a failed relationship. You're going to wonder how to even breathe when it's over.  And, you'll recall the countless times when you stayed up until all hours listening to "You" by Bonnie Raitt and how it still gets you to this day when you hear it.

7. It's going to take a long time, but you'll eventually find your grief to be in your past.  You never forget it, but you are somehow able to put one foot in front of the other and breathe.

8.  Be grateful for the experience, Innocence. You'll  get to the point where you'll feel  profound sadness for your ex's trials and tribulations.  Just don't let that be an excuse to forget or excuse what was done to you.

That's about it.  If I could have had this conversation with myself so many years ago, it may have made a difference.  But, knowing me, the words wouldn't penetrate and I would have missed alot of life experiences.

I guess it's just as well that I am able to look back and know that I learned a little something in this life.

More Musings Later-

Wednesday, February 06, 2013

Likes and Gripes

I've developed a very bad habit lately and that is I've been neglecting my writing/blog for too long.  It's not that I don't still have my thoughts on social media, life, politics and television, I just haven't made the time to post about it.

So, without further adieu: GRIPES
People who wear their shirt sleeves too long to the point of the sleeve covering their hands.  If this is some sort of style, I don't like it.

People who wear shirt tails hanging out from a sweater.  It looks like you forgot to tuck your shirt in.  Makes no sense to me.

If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times:  I despise the baggy pants on guys.  It looks absolutely ridiculous as the wearer of this garment has to hold the waist of his pants while he walks around.  Of course, he must have on underwear or he could be arrested for indecent exposure.  Why is this fad continuing?  If guys knew the origin of this fad, I'm willing to claim odds they would buy a pair of pants that fit, asap.

How much longer must the public endure "The Bachelor?"  Make it stop.

Why do furniture commercials always have people dancing in them?

Men who cut their hair short and shape it into a point on the top of their head.  It looks ridiculous.  Stop it.

Men and women who have the "tousled" hair do.  There's a difference in a "natural" look and the art of putting a mixer on top of your head and pressing start.

Men who have stubble and the tousled look.  If you're going for the look of "I just woke up,"  Mission accomplished.  Take a shower and shave for God's sake.

That the Kia car dealer in Nashville doesn't do his own commercials anymore because of his altercation with the police.

The new show "Nashville".  I LOOOOVE this show.

The fact that Facebook has reunited me with so many of my friends from my past.

The fact that I love my life.

Watching movies.  I've really gotten interested in doing this again.  Can't wait to see Star Trek's newest movie in May.

That Obama won. :D

The Shark Tank.  It's refreshing to watch a show where people are educated on finance and entrepreneur's creativity and strategy.  One of the few shows that allows people to use their brain.

Imitating Barbara Corcoran for my sister.

Laughing so hard that I cry.

Dr. Phil.  You never have to guess what he thinks.

That I'm blogging again.  :)

More Musings Later-